When you are the parent of the groom you're sometimes left out of most of the major decisions made regarding the wedding. The role of the groom's parents traditionally has been to support the groom and the bride's parents by planning around the bride's decisions. Traditionally the groom's parents are responsible for some of the financial responsibilities. Today more and more parents are taking on a more involved and active role in this area. Below are some guidelines to keep in mind when you find yourself about to become an in-law.

The parents of the groom should make an effort to meet the bride's family before the engagement is officially announced. Send a note to the bride welcoming her into your family as well as a note the the bride's mother expressing happiness about the couples engagement.

It's recommended to establish who is paying for what early in the planning process. Tradition tells us that the groom's family expenses are compiled from their wedding attire, travel expenses, rehersal dinner, lodging, and the couple's gift. As tradition meets with modern times more and more financially able families of the groom are contributing to additional cost of the wedding such as flowers, beverages, or splitting the cost for the reception dinner. This is more common when the number of guest continues to grow past the couples budget.

It is extremely helpful to the bride and those involved in the planning process when you compile your guest list promptly and completely. Traditionally the bride or her mother will keep you updated as to responses or wedding gifts received from your family or friends If the father of the groom is also the best man, he should arrange to be fitted for his formalwear as soon as the bride and groom have decided on the style and fashion for the men in the wedding party.

When planning the rehearsal dinner remember that each member of the wedding party should be included along with their spouses. It is also recommended to invite grand parents and out-of-town guests if space permits it.

Traditionally the groom's mother is escorted and seated before the bride's mother and sits in the first pew on the right side of the aisle. If her husband in not part of the wedding party he sits in the same pew.

At the end of the ceremony or during the reception the groom's parents may be asked to participate in the formal receiving line with the bride's parents.